Red Jacketed Snow Shoveler, but not me.
I am a shoveler. Yes, Yes I am. While Victor is perfectly comfortable blowing snow from the warmth of the cab of his John Deere tractor, I, being the more earthy of the two of us, get a real warming out of buttoning up in my warmest red outer gear and grabbing the closest shovel to toss off a few inches of the white stuff blanketing our porches and walkways. To tread where no tractor dares!
This being my second year as chief shoveler, I have learned a few tricks of the trade I would like to share with you.
1. Don’t shovel into the wind. This is a lesson I should not have had to learn twice.. Okay. Got it? I thought I did too, but this afternoon my shovel full of snow was picked up and blown directly into my down-wind, upward-posed face as I watched my toss hurl back on me. Let me save you the bitter cold shock of making this mistake.
2. It is a good idea to be ambidextrous with your shoveling so as to not bulk up on one side and hobble around like Igor from Frankenstein.
3. Do not walk where you are planning to next shovel. Your weight will make a crushed patch of snow that won’t shovel up. Shovel first, then walk.
4. Sometimes a shovel is not the best tool for shoveling. Sometimes a simple broom and a sweep can get the job done. We have had the lightest airiest snow this season, very conducive to sweeping. Also, if you are looking to power tool the task, if it is light and blowing you can you the leaf blower. This does make the job somewhat more interesting, but definitely not quicker, not really slower either. No edge on timing.
5. Get your homecoming prepared before you leave. Simmer water for tea. Turn the fireplace on. Make it so you are in an position of instantly warming up upon return from the frozen tundra we know as outside.
6. I can’t really afford the warmest jackets hot of the rack of our local clothing store…. But I can afford the warmest jacket from our local thrift shop and have one that I love to use for my shoveling days. It’s bright red so I won’t get lost in the snow and it has a hood. VERY important. No scarf or layers of scarves will ever replace a good hood. But you can add a scarf to a good hood.
7. Enjoy the free health club benefits of the snow removal ritual. You are working every muscle, especially if you follow tip #2. You can even shovel when you don’t have to if you want to keep the exercise ruse up without anyone the wiser.
8. Do not replace the newly lost calories with sweets and hot drinks like cocoa. Go straight to shots for the quickest warm-up.
That completes about as senseless a post as any. Although these are good tips, most folks I know aren’t bound to a snow zone quite like we have gotten ourselves into. Laugh with me, Okay? I am really still laughing.
Cedaroma Lodge 